The Long Solitude
by Fictatious
Summary: Belarus is tired of being alone and Ivan sympathises, he really does.


**Series:** Hetalia  
**Title:** The Long Solitude  
**Author:** Fictatious  
**Character(s):** Russia, Belarus  
**Rating:** 13  
**Warnings:** aaaaangst  
**Summary:** Belarus is tired of being alone.

…

When Ivan stepped out of the conference room after a meeting with the powers that be, he found his sister sitting quietly by the door, her hands folded in her lap and her ankles crossed delicately under her modest skirt. He wondered when she had arrived. She hadn't called ahead, but she often didn't; she was afraid of being talked out of coming. Ivan sighed and gave her a soft smile as she rose from the chair to meet him. "Hello, Natalia," he said, offering her his arm and she took it gladly.

"This is an unexpected visit," he noted aloud as he led her down the hall, away from the legislative areas of the capitol building and towards the areas for his personal habitation.

"I wanted to see you," Natalia replied quietly.

"And it is always a pleasure to see your lovely face, my dear one."

"I would rather that you look upon it more often, Brother." Natalia's hand tightened minutely on his arm.

Ivan sighed again. "Your people need you, Natalia."

"I need you."

"... I'm not strong enough to take care of you now." Ivan glanced down at the top of her head, the way her perfectly groomed hair parted at the center and pooled round her shoulders.

"We would be stronger together," she said in a soft, enticing voice, her large eyes turning upward to meet his eyes. "You aren't happy as it is now and neither am I. We are no better for letting the world come through our door or for allowing the capitalists to fill their corporate bellies. What have we gained? Nothing!" Natalia emphasized the statement with a stamp of her foot. Her voice was raising well above the level she normally spoke at and her grip on Ivan's arm was becoming uncomfortable. "And what have we lost, Brother? They do not respect you! They do not fear you as they did!" She stopped walking and tugged at him to face her. "They have _tamed_ you!" she whined, her eyes threatening tears.

Ivan's teeth clenched tightly and he was silent, fighting back a surge of anger, desperately wanting to shout, to deny what Natalia was saying. His pride was not gone. It never would be. But cooperation yielded more reliable results than domination. This was a new world and he had to adapt to it or risk being left behind. He let out a steadying breath and put a hand on his sister's shoulder. "The world does not spin backwards, Natalia. The times have changed."

"You're angry," she whispered. "You know you should have more than you do. You know that you are better than this."

"_Better_ has so many interpretations, dearest." To add finality to the statement, Ivan turned back towards his quarters and started walking again.

"I'M TIRED OF BEING ALONE!" Natalia screamed after him.

Ivan paused, his back to her, and stood still for a long time as he heard her start to sniffle. At last he turned and looked at his little sister as she tried to wipe away tears with the heels of her hands. "... I know, Natalia," he said, feeling a wave of bitter depression settle on his heart. "But it's what we are."

Natalia looked up at him and then sobbed and ran forward, pressing herself against her brother's chest and trying to bury herself in his coat, to block out the rest of the world. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry, my precious sister," he whispered against her hair. "The existence that we lead requires us to be separated from our own by land and sea. We will always be alone because of what we are."

"It's not fair," Natalia mumbled, twisting her hands in his lapels. "It's not fair."

"I know, my dear one, I know." He kissed her hair and stroked her shoulder. "But it can't be changed... I'm sorry." Natalia sobbed for several minutes before fading into quiet whimpers and hiccups and Ivan waited patiently, holding her in the middle of the hall.

"About a hundred years ago," Ivan started quietly as her breathing calmed, "a man asked me what the secret of immortality was." He lifted a hand and stroked it through Natalia's hair, looking into her wet eyes as she looked back up at him. "I told him the secret was that I would trade with him in an instant if I could."

…

A/N: The guy Ivan is referencing is Rasputin. I'm not sure if he was actually into the immortality scene, but he was a faith-healer/mystic and pretty darn crazy-out-there.


End file.
